the CRUSH.

It was a dark and stormy Fourth of July evening in 2007. Lightning and thunder were flashing and crashing everywhere. Daryl and I were snug as two bugs in a rug in the condo. So much so, that I was in bed reading and Daryl was cleaning up the kitchen before heading in to join me.

Suddenly the fire alarm in the hallway went off! Of course, I remained in bed thinking it was just some electronic reaction to the lightning storm outside. I was just finishing a page of Glenn Beck’s the Christmas Sweater (LOL…NOT!), when all of a sudden, Daryl BURST into the bedroom and said that I HAVE to get dressed and come out in the hall IMMEDIATELY. I panicked and threw on a pair of sweats and a tee and followed his lead into the hallway.

“Darn,” Daryl declared (lovely alliteration—also, note that Daryl refrains from using REAL curse words which is VERY admirable but I MORE than make up for it with MY trash mouth). ANYway… I was starting to see a little smoke in the hallway and the alarm was screaming in my ears, but it was surprising to see that Daryl had a look of disappointment on his face. “What’s the matter Bub (my pet name for him)?” I asked. “Well, I wanted you to see Joel’s chest. He had his shirt off!” he retorted.

WHAT? Here I thought Daryl was trying to get me to evacuate for fear of me burning alive but he just wanted me to see Joel without his shirt. Apparently Joel had come out into the hallway to investigate the fire alarm as well. As it turned out, there actually WAS a small fire in one of the condos on the first floor, but that was secondary to the beginning of… the CRUSH.

Joel lives diagonally from us on our floor of four condos. We’d run into him before, together and separately. Cute kid, real “surfer-type” but nothing that we would have stalked by any means… that is until… he took off his shirt. We also found out that he works out at the gym (not ours unfortunately) almost daily. He’s dumb as nails, but we’ve come to discover that we really don’t care. SIGH.

When we hear his door slam shut as he goes to the gym, Daryl and I rush to the window to see just how tight his shirt is ‘cause he’s just that HOT. Daryl and I look at each other in disgust knowing that we are SO shallow, but we continue to have a Pavlovian response to the door across the hall slamming shut. We wonder if Joel knows that we think he’s adorable. I also wonder if he’s smart enough to even know that we’re not just “guy roommates.” I think not.


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