whistle while you work.

I don’t trust people who can whistle.

Let me correct that to I don’t trust people who can whistle WELL. They seem TOO happy. No one can be THAT orally gifted AND that content, can they?

There’s this guy at work who whistles loud and often. His technique even includes a vibrato. I’m impressed, but I’m cautious. The guy has the power to write me up and get me fired. Should I learn to whistle now? Do I compliment him on his oral prowess? Wouldn’t I be hypocritical to tell him I LOVE his tune, when it really makes the hair on the back of my neck stand straight up?

I find I often do not care for whistlers as people. I don’t hold a grudge against hummers, or dancers. Even gossipers don’t grate my nerves like the happy go lucky whistler. Maybe it’s a form of jealousy. Am I envious of the dexterity involved, or that fact that they’re so friggin’ happy? I should find a therapist that can explain that to me.

Maybe it’s due to the fact that I’m melodically challenged when it comes to puckering to blow. Don’t get me wrong… I can suck the golf balls out of a garden hose, but I can’t seem to get the air to blow OUT quite as skillfully.

I think there should be a whistling class offered in schools and colleges. I’d imagine many a politician would take advantage of ANY course that would provide skills on blowing hot air. Perhaps a class on just blowing period would be good.

I think I’m going to write my local college board to recommend that we incorporate an “introduction to blowing” course. Imagine the talented whistlers we’d get!


1 Comment

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One response to “whistle while you work.

  1. Never been much good at whistling either. As a farmer’s daughter, it was terrible. My father was brilliant at it – controlled the farm dogs perfectly. While I could deliver lambs and many other farm things, I NEVER got the whistling happening. 😦

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