Health be damned… and the rest of us too!

I was reading the Face Book posts of some of my “health-conscious” friends this morning before work.

I’d say approximately 25% of my list of Face Book friends are what most would consider “healthy.” Maybe I should rephrase that, because in my opinion anyone who has a heartbeat and can breathe is pretty much healthy, however, I DO have several “friends” who are truly health-conscious.

Ugh.

I have to live every day with their bombardment of statuses regarding their HOURLY workout routines and diets such as: “Going for another run! Feels GREAT!”; “Did an hour and a half on the stair-stepper today!”; “Made a fantastic dinner of veggies, tofu and a protein shake – kids LOVED it too!”; “Met a wonderful team in my spinning class!”

Even I have fallen prey to updating an occasional status or two about taking a walk every now and then just to “fit in!” But now I’m sick and tired of all the positive, motivational, healthy lifestyles! And just when I thought I was gonna blow my top…

I was saved by Jesus.

Apparently, this Saturday May 21st, we will have the second coming of Christ. From the snippets and sound-bytes I’ve been hearing we will have some sort of earthquake this weekend (God… don’t let me die at work under a cheap sofa) and only GOOD Christians will be “selected” to join Jesus in life everlasting. Then from what I understand, the FINAL earth-destroying quake will happen on October 21st causing the world to be consumed by fire and those originally chosen Christians will float like the angels they are into Heaven.

Obviously, I’ve paraphrased, but you get the point (as in pitchfork, I’m guessin’).

All that being said, I’m going to sit here and open another bag of marshmallow Circus Peanuts and raise my glass of non diet Pepsi to my health-conscious Face Book Friends! You all know who you are. After this Saturday it will not matter who is healthy and who is not!

Cheers!

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5 Comments

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5 responses to “Health be damned… and the rest of us too!

  1. From what I understand, from my Southern Baptist upbringing, is that Jesus is supposed to return like a thief in the night at a time that no one knows. So how do these people know? I mean, logically, it makes no sense.

    Anyway…

    I have those health conscious Facebook updater friends, too. Along with those that post every single accomplishment in every single Facebook game that they play.

    “I found some gold”, “I found a farm animal”, “help me hoe my fields”, “I just got a high score on [insert obnoxious game here].”

  2. I like your take on all of this 🙂

  3. I’d be one of Those type of Facebook friends if we were “friended.” 😦
    I need to start reading you in the morning because you’d make my day with your sense of humor.

  4. Lisa Wields Words

    So does that mean I only have three days left to live? Why am I working so hard planning all of the stuff I have scheduled for June? I think I’ll take a few days off. 😉

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