Searching for my White Privilege.

I’m not black, but my husband is. Is that my white privilege?

Race is certainly on the forefront of social media and TV. I’ve been reading a lot about “white privilege” with regards to crime and police and life in general. I’m still trying to understand it, and have been informed that unless my face is black, I really won’t ever understand. My voice is irrelevant when it comes to race. The argument is about race Ed, but we don’t really need to hear what YOU have to say about it because you are white. How could you know about what it’s like not to have the “Privilege?”

I’m still confused.

I have a husband. I can be now legally married in my state. Is that my white privilege?

I can have my pick of universities to attend while taking out student loans until my head hurts without the benefit of thousands of minority based scholarships. Is that my white Privilege?

I can walk down the street in my hometown hand in hand with my husband to catcalls and stares (and in some cases violence). Is that my privilege? Ever try to kiss another man in a restaurant or at the mall while shopping in suburbia? Try it. Is that a Privilege too?

How about we go to any church that we want, to worship how we want? Not so easy. Is that my privilege?

I’ve been labeled a princess, told I talk like a queer, and been made fun of the way I use my hands. Is that my privilege?

I have a problem with being told that I’m born with something extra that makes it easier for me. Something that makes my struggle less important… less relevant.

I’m still trying to find where my privilege is.

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8 Comments

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8 responses to “Searching for my White Privilege.

  1. Great post Ed. While I do think that there is such a thing as white privilege, I too feel frustrated by the fact that the fact of being white seems to negate other issues. Did you know that, at one point in our history, Jews were not considered white? So, if I was not longer considered white, my experiences of antisemitism would have more value, but because I am considered white they are just minor inconveniences, I guess. And don’t forget, the fact that I am a woman doesn’t matter either, because I am a white woman. Nor does it matter that I am married to an Asian and have a mixed race child, because anything they experience doesn’t affect me . . . after all I am privileged on all fronts. Of course, I’m sure someone will attack my response . . . but the point is that, even though white privilege does exist it does not negate personal narratives or individual voices. But, in as divisive a society as ours, we can’t seem to recognize that fact.

    • And that was my point Lisa. It is very frustrating to not have a voice in race relations (or any relations) because I can’t possibly identify. We ALL can identify as you have responded. Our voices are no less relevant or important. Thank you for reading as always, and thank you for sharing your valuable insight.

  2. Pingback: The Power of Personal Narratives | Lisa A. Kramer: Woman Wielding Words

  3. Eddie chandler

    Well said Ed n Lisa.

  4. Irene

    And this is why I adore you!

  5. I guess the only white privilege left to you is to not be ‘shot while driving black’ or ‘shot while while walking black’. Says more about society than colour, doesn’t it? As the daughter of a retired (white male) cop and the mother of a mixed race son and now grandmother of a mixed race baby boy, I probably have a lot more insights into the good side of people than the bad.

    But hey, I almost got shot on two different occasions being in a straight mixed-race relationship. Florida is a lovely place, was even more fun in the early 80’s! One of the reasons I love you guys’ blog is that I can (sort of) understand what you deal with, and I love how you always manage to keep smiling – at least on here!

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